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Karma Free Writing will be offering 27 Days of Karma Free Writing Prompts starting on the 1st day of Spring. These writing prompts are designed to stimulate the creative process for writing your personal story - and beyond.
27 Day Karma Free Writing Prompts - Honorarium
The 1st 14 days are free. To go the whole 27 days there is a $27 honorarium.
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2010
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April
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- Stories from the Gathering ...
- Thank You ....
- Day #27. The Last Day. Theme: "I am completely o...
- Day #26 - Theme: Tantrum
- Day #25 - Theme: "Releasing on the Exhale"
- Day #24 - Theme: "That is so me!"
- Day #23 - Theme: "Food."
- Day #22 - Theme: " I would NEVER ... "
- Day #21 - Theme: "What we eat off of ... "
- Day #20 - Theme - "The Liberty Bell"
- Day #19 - Theme: "Get the Picture?"
- No title
- #18 - Theme: "Listen & Follow"
- Day #17 - Theme: Intimacy
- Day #16 - Theme: Lies
- Day #15. Theme: "What connects me in my relations...
- Day #14 - Theme: Time & Space
- Video Support for Prompt #13 - View this FIRST !!!
- Day #13 - Theme: "What did I notice, What did I N...
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April
(19)
About Me
Closure.
ReplyDeleteI’m so over it. Over carrying the guilt, plus his load and mine. What a roller coaster ride it has been. Like a yo-yo diet. Someone told me recently: “Think of this way, he’ll always a special place in your heart.” It made sense.
All the tips and insight from self-help to clueless shrinks. Is it just not meant to be? I believe in free will. We have a choice. We choose our paths. How we feel about it? That’s just the human condition. No escaping that!
Forever, I have refused to "settle." I sought out expert advice. Sympathy. A solution, perhaps? I have continuously tried to fix things. Or pretend to myself not to care.
Suddenly, I felt a huge sense of liberation. You’re too nice, friends and strangers tell me. So what? That’s my choice, my philosophy, mantra, way of life.
But just yesterday, I felt a free soothing and glorious moments of freedom! Hooray. “Game over” flashed through my mind. We’re out of quarters… And, frankly, this beloved game is getting old. All the spices and trimmings too. The frenemies who use my vice against me. As their juicy gossip of choice.
Kindness is seen as weakness, I hear them say.
A glorious sense of freedom. Happiness. As if a huge weight had been lifted. Respond, do not respond. How tacky this digital age has made us. Text instead of a phone call? I embrace the anger and think good. This is it. I have myself, I love myself. I have the ease and comfort of being able to walk ahead. I don’t need anyone to bet on me. I have more than plenty with myself.
Fair weather friends, someone told me bitterly. I embrace the knowledge, the revelation of the truth. There is no perfect solution. Not now, not later. This abyss, this darkness, it’s a comfort zone, and I want out!
I shared my good energy, and another emotional vampire is revealed. Trying to gain control over me. Then another. Uninvited. How could they misunderstand? He’d understand. I know that much.
How bittersweet goodbyes are…. He always sucked at goodbyes.
The designer shoe section -- well actually the entire 8th floor -- of Saks Fifth Avenue was an odd place for it to happen.
ReplyDeleteThe wood floors of this Manhattan institution creaked politely as women in stilettos and high black leather boots walked from shoe display to shoe display. They were of the same tribe, picking up a shoe, bringing it to eye level and inspecting it as carefully as a newborn baby.
$475, $650, $985 prices are printed discretely in small labels on the undersides.
I pick up a shoe and then feel exhausted through my whole being. It came on so fast. I sit down on the white leather stool.
"May I help you, miss?" asks the handsome 30-something shoe salesman who looked like the American melting pot, part Asian, part Latin, part who knows what.
"No, I'm just thinking," I say. But there is no thinking going on. Just feeling so, so tired.
"I'm over worrying about money," I realize as I sit amid the chaos of Saks.
The czar ruling my life has died. Not execution style, but from a slow decline. I'm so used to obeying him, working crazy hours to service him.
But he's gone and I realize that I'm exhausted from years of servitude.
I leave Saks by the side door so I don't have to walk through the Chanel and Lancombe and Nars and Shiseido makeup counters, which today look like a circus hall of mirrors.
Just across the street is St. Patrick's. I slide into a pew up front near the altar, look up at the majestic oval stained glass, and close my eyes.
I am free.
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteNo one teaches you about credit card debt in high school. You’re given one of those little plastic cards when you leave home, and voila! It’s magic. You can have whatever you want.
ReplyDeleteI am completely over being a slave to debt. I am completely over having to pay for things that I don’t use anymore or don’t wear anymore.
I got out of credit card debt six years ago. I paid off one high-interest card after another, and now, I only allow myself to buy things that can be paid off in full when I get the statement at the end of the month. If I can’t afford it, I can’t have it. That is such a freeing way to live.
Getting out of debt has freed me to be more of who I really am. Relieving myself of money worries removed the stress that weighed so heavily. It’s also given me more time and energy to do the things I really want to do. My mind has space to generate new ideas versus stress. It's so empowering!
I took nearly 30 years to finally get over it, to let IT quit ruining every relationship I tried to have with a man.
ReplyDeleteNow, the incident seems to have happened to another person since I have changed so much in the past 15 years.
I can still think back to that summer day in 1965 when the heat of the sun was almost unberable and the air was brittle. I dreaded the walk home so my friends brother and his friends offered me a ride home. It was a ride that would oblitrate the sun in my soul for years to come.
I was a true innocent then. In all of my 14 years I had been exposed to little by way of violence, alcoholism, drugs. I was a good little Baptist girl rarely let out of my parents sight. I did not know that getting into a care with 3 men who had been drinking was probably a bad idea. Ignorance, in this case, was not bliss.
The said they had stop and pick up some papers and said I could wait in the car or come up. I went up to get out of the blistering heat.
Once I entered they locked the door and asked me to read something from an x rated book (at least x-rated by 60's standards) and I cringed, became almost frozen with fear and rushed into the bathroom. I waited for what seeme like an eternity. I heard the door open and shut and thought they had left. I opened the door only to have hands grab at me and rip the clothes from my body.
There were three of them and I had no vocabulary to describe what had happened. I did not know what rape was, that this was how a woman got pregnant, that I had lost my virginity. I do not remember how long I was in shock before the door opened again and someone came to me rescue. Helped me get cleaned up and took me home.
It wasn't until a year later that a friend explained what had happened to me. It took 30 years for me to let it go. It was history, over and nothing I could ever do would ever change it. If I held onto what I could not change it would destory me.
Afetr counseling and speaking out about rape for years, I woke up one morning and it was over. No more nightmares, no more cringing if a man held me too tightly. I looked upon the world again as a bright and sunny place where love could conquer all and understanding could lead to freedom.
No longer shy, ashamed, or introverted, I grab life and embrace it with enthusiasm and without fear. The memory is there, but it is just a story from my past and without my past I would not have the present me that I am so happy with.
Wishing all happiness and their heart's desire. It has been a nice journey.
I'm over being crabby. My inner self is a mix between Sally and Linus in Peanuts. My real self is more of Lucy.
ReplyDeleteI'm not sarcastic, bitter, or hateful...really I'm a crab.
I am bugged by the great Pacific trash heap, and now there's one in the Atlantic.
I'm really sick and tired of racism. And homophobia. I don't have any more tolerance for either of these.
The fact that someone is some sort of color or that someone is attracted to another of the same sex is boring conversation.
I"m irritated when I see trash strewn about in parks, on the street, in the creek, under bridges. How can you not notice that you just dropped that Whataburger cup? It's giant!
I'm frustrated with styrofoam. It doesn't biodegrade, when it breaks down it releases noxious gasses. We've known this for years...why do we keep making it? Why do we keep buying it?
I'm totally pissed off about wars. Come on, this is ridiculous. Almost as soon as we wandered out of the slimy ooze we began batting each other over the heads with our flipper feet...or whatever.
Can't we come up with something better to do with our time?
How do people end up being designers of things like land mines? Who formed those people? We can't blame the violence of video games...the mines were here long before the games.
And back sliding on international treaties. I find myself griping about this constantly. If you're gonna take the time to make a treaty, get all the national leaders involved who need to be involved, fly all over the world drinking out of styrofoam cups, then stick to the treaty.
I am so over discussing the problems in the church. It's like this...if you are the priest, minister, pastor...keep your zippers zipped and doors opened. No matter what, do no harm to children. AND stop arguing about whether or not the church should ordain homosexuals...it has been ordaining them FOREVER.
I want to stop being a crab, but when I think about it, what will happen if I stop crabbing about these things? If no one is crabby about these things, well we all might become Republicans.
I guess I'm not done being a crab.
I'm done trying not to be a crab.
It is
ReplyDeletemoment
to
moment
for me
right
now.
The warm blanket of anxiety, which used to comfort me, has been burned in the fire. Many of the logs that I used to fool myself with, thrash myself with, feed, warm, bathe, and surround myself with…have been tossed. Though they are still there, in the garden, I find it harder to use them today.
My thoughts function in an unseemly manner. Please do not let me operate heavy machinery. Please ask the children to go upstairs. Keep pitchforks at arms length. Follow the animals into shelter. Avoid all eye contact. Chew food. Stretch legs. Breath now. Lunge first. Thrust deep. Ask later.
inkydinky: I love your take on this exercise - bravo!
ReplyDeleteimallen5 - what a devastating story. thenkyou for sharing it and for being a hero in your own life...
YOU HAVE ALL BEEN AMAZING FELLOW TRAVELLERS ON THIS CREATIVE QUEST. Mazel tov!
lkelly: that took strength, i can relate! funny how the devil's in the details. something trivial can be monstrous. congratulations.
ReplyDeleteActress: kudos to overcoming one of our biggest seriously underrated problems! fixing that could even fix the issues w/ styrofoam that inkydinky mentions.
ReplyDeleteInkydinky: i love the train of thought(s) - speaks to the "don't sweat the small stuff" methodology.. but it's so big!
lmallen5: there are no words, but hope. thanks for sharing such deep and personal stuff.. you're beautiful..
S.S. hang in there! stay the course..
Trixie: I agree kudos everyone.
I'll miss you all!
I don't know if anyone will check in, but thank you so much. This has been wonderful fun. I looked forward everyday to what you all wrote. I miss you already! I'm sad I won't meet any of you on the 19th. You are very talented people. Thank you for letting me tag along.
ReplyDeleteOh, inkydinkyparlezvous I was so looking forward to meeting you. Very sad you won't be joining us. Thank you for your beautiful postings. I enjoyed your writing very much.
ReplyDeleteI am completely over hanging onto beliefs and habits that are no longer serving me. I know I have the power to change my will. I nolonger have to hang on the these thoughts that seem to control me into trouble, like credit card debt. I'm not so sure of am ready to give in to not shopping and buying designer shoe, which is truly my love. Yet I can maybe take baby steps to giving more thought to why I want them in the first place or take a look at my wanting mind. Which really like to run aways at times. Well I am human and I do like who I have become by my past. All seems to be well. No earthquakes, tornados, floods, fire. So I am a happy camper right now.
ReplyDeleteThanks everyone for your wonderful sharing.
Thanks Joshua for a wonderful insightful exciting 27 days. I will miss everyone too.
Triple A...I'm sad too. Maybe another time!
ReplyDeleteThank you all for your stories, your courage to share, and your lens into the world. I'll miss the anticipation and reward of logging on to karmafreewriting every morning.
ReplyDeleteTIME AND MONEY
ReplyDeleteTHOUGHT I WOULD LIKE TO TALK ABOUT TIME. SEEMS I KNOW SOMETHING ABOUT IT. OR MAYBE NOT. ATLEASE BEING OFF WITH TIMING IS WHAT I KNOW A LOT ABOUT. ‘MISSING THE TRAIN’ I USE NO TIME NO SPACE. IT’S A LITTLE DIFFERENT.
WELL I WAS BORN EARLY A SUPRISE TO EVERYONE. That is what I do best. I became a late bloomer as life unfolded. Yet, I was a happy, healthy and really smiley kid. That could be the end of the story. “The Facts”
Yes, there is more!!!
Well either I had lots of time on my hands and no money. I always have had a credit card though, to keep me above water or not. I always got along. Seems I did what I truly wanted to do from time to time. No direction, no $. No friends to do things with either to busy or no money or no interest in doing the things I wanted to do. The Timing was always off. They were having babies or traveling already with their husbands. Just not wanting to do what I wanted to do at the time when I finally could do it. Even if I paid there way they weren’t interested. Then when I had $ time and happiness still no one to go and share the wealth. Then one day a man found me and I just gave and gave I truly wanted him to succeed. I was willing to do anything. He kept taking and I did get to see and expire new worlds because of him. So there is no complains towards him. Only the timing was off again. I felt I didn’t deserve this money, as I didn’t work for it. I also felt I didn’t do my best when it came to making decisions. Isn’t that what one is suppose to do to get money in the noble way. The earthly way. Didn’t know what to do with the money anyway or the time it was all so confusing. Why wasn’t there any training? Knowledge to find. Was I just mad? Was I disappointed with myself? Did I want someone to come and rescue me? Love me for who I was not for the money reasons. I sure was uncomfortable with having so much money when I never really earn any or had any before. I had the coaches the books, tel classes even a B in college in accounting. I used quicken too. What is it about the timing that played into this eqazion maybe that was it? So I just let time and money pass. It was so uncomfortable anyway. And everyone told me to take care of myself. I didn’t want to take care of myself I wanted someone else to take care of me like my x husband did. Why was a given such a big job without any preparation? I just wanted it to go away. And sure enough it did. Be patient is what other people told me. Wait for the energy to change. Be alert, and aware, it will come. And don’t forget to ‘TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF”/WHAT DOES THAT MEAN ANYWAY
WELL I DO LIKE WHO I AM AND I NOW KNOW EVERYONE WORKS WITH “TIME AND MONEY”